Getting Back To My Happy Place

I never talk about anything too heavy on my blog because I want this space to be filled with happy content, nobody likes a debbie downer do they. This is how I have been living my life recently, going along with the bad stuff and hoping it will work out in the end so that my life doesn't look like a pile of rubbish to anyone on the outside.

I should have known I would crack after a while. I lasted a good month of ignoring the bad and focusing in on the good areas of my life. Then the bad started to effect my home life and that's when it all had to stop.

I made the biggest decision of my life this week and took redundancy from my job. It was a hard decision to make and it took a lot for me to finally do it. If I didn't have the support of Callum or my family I wouldn't have had the courage to it.

A lot has changed in my work life in the last 6-8 months, some for the good some for the bad and it has taken a lot out of me. I have always been a laid back person who just got on with life and had fun doing it, recently I became emotional about the smallest of things and wasn't myself anymore. My work life took over my home life and I wasn't okay with that. It also didn’t help that my new store was an hour away from my home so it made my days even longer and when I did 12 hours days, I just became a zombie.

It all came to a head when I visited an old friend of mine who I used to work with, this person had help me get to where I wanted to be before it all went wrong. I got so emotional talking to this person about how I was feeling, this was the wake up call I needed to get out.

Luckily because I was in a new role I still had the opportunity to take redundancy, I now have time to properly look for a new job that makes me happy and gives me a decent work/life balance.

I haven't seen my friends or spent time with my family in what feels like months and I'm sad that I let it get to that stage. I was too wrapped up in trying to sort out my work life that I ignored my personal life, I couldn't split myself enough to be everywhere I wanted.

I have been working since I was 16 and worked so hard to climb the ladder at work to become management, so talking about taking redundancy was a no brainier for me. I love to work and with a new house to pay for I wasn't going to let myself be jobless for any amount of time but I have had to be a little selfish and put my happiness first this time around.

Right now I am enjoying the sunshine, spending time with friends and family and doing things that I enjoy. I have dug out my book I kept putting off finishing because I didn't have any time and I am full of ideas for my blog because my head is free.

I am on every job site that exists right now and I am going to go to my local agency to meet with recruiters who might have a new path for me to down. I have loads of experience in retail management but I think I want  to move into office work now with a Monday to Friday week so I can spend proper time with Cal and my family who all work Monday to Friday.

While I am looking for my new job I am going to spend a lot of time getting myself back on track and try to figure out what I want to do with my life. I've never felt so unimportant and unaccomplished in my life but I did what I had to do and I already feel so much better.

Now I've had my rabble and got my feelings out it time to get back to happy posts! I have a lot planned in the next few weeks which I'm excited about including a Royal Wedding party at my house next Saturday!